Amid all the Madness of March, Eagles' head coach and arrogant apologist Andy Reid (AKA The Mormon Mound), offered some pearls of wisdom during a closed conversation with an unnamed "Eagles employee" (Suck-Up Spadaro). The comments were quietly posted on the team's web site, and the Inquirer's requests to follow up on these brilliant insights with Reid himself were flatly denied. Distracted as we all are by bracketology these days, Kotite's Corner as a public service would like to drag Reid's remarks out of the shadows and give them the wider attention they so richly deserve. Here, then, is the wit and wisdom of Philly's best stand-up comedian, Andy Reid:
Asked about the team's underwhelming free agent moves: "You can take the team we have today and go compete for a championship in the National Football League. Now, you may have to move some people around to do some things there, and we have to get a little more depth at some positions, but with the people we have, we know we can compete for a championship."
(Great start, Andy -- you have the audience in stitches right from the opening monologue. Leno and Letterman would be envious!)
Pressed on why the Eagles have taken a "conservative approach" to free agency when they have enormous salary-cap room: "You can say it's a conservative approach, or you can just say it's smart."
(All righty, then...Please stop, Andy, we just can't take anymore -- we're laughing so hard that it hurts)
Asked if the current receiving corps is good enough to win a Super Bowl: "I think it is as you compare it to other teams, the teams that went to the Super Bowl."
(No more, Andy, no more...You have Yuengling coming out of our noses!)
Uh, what about that guy Fitzgerald, Andy?: "Now, you've got Larry Fitzgerald, who is the elite of the elite, and to compare him to our guys -- I think Larry is probably the finest receiver in the game right now. But I'll put our group up against other receiving groups in this league..."
(Um, like Super Bowl MVP Santonio Holmes and that other guy, Hines Ward? Stop, Andy, stop -- you're killing us!)
And, finally, asked about his approach to coaching, which Tra Thomas suggested was a bit on the passive (clueless) side: "I am who I am. I do what I do."
(What a clever finish -- repeating an obscure quote from Kramer in one of the Seinfeld episodes, thereby subtly comparing himself to a doofus for anyone aware of the character -- Andy is clearly a master of cerebral comedy as well as slapstick!)
So there you have it, Eagles' fans -- deja vu all over again! As long as the Reid/Banner/Lurie gang is in charge, we're condemned to live every day like characters in Groundhog Day....Let's go Phils!!